Holy Cakemolie

You can give me a lot of things, and I will be very gracious about all gifts, but when I get cake, I go koo koo. You know the rumor that men think about sex every 7 seconds. I think about cake that often. White cake. Chocolate cake. Cakes my mom used to bake. Cakes my friend bakingnotwriting has made. Cakes in the shape of a ballerina from my uncle’s bakery when I was a child. I keep a repository of cake images in my mind that I flip through all the time for no reason, other than I love me some cake.

When the Big Guy, the Little Dog, and I got back from our walk on the beach yesterday evening, there was a box sitting on our front porch from Williams Sonoma. Inside the box was this, from my cousin, and the card read “Happy Spring, Cake Fiend!”

“This is CAKE!” I screamed to the dog and man.

“No,” they both said, and then, the Big Guy broke off some of the back of the flower pot and we ate it. I broke off part of flower and ate it. In all my years of cakery, this cake takes the cake. It’s uber delicious and beautiful and looks like a spring bouquet. Amazing. Magical.

I immediately called my cousin.

“Do you like it?” she asked.

“Like” doesn’t adequately describe my emotion toward that cake. Covet. Love. Honor. Cherish – oh yeah, that something else like marriage.

Then, she said, “One time I sent one of these cakes to a friend and called to see how they liked it. They told me it was ‘chewy’ so I called Williams Sonoma and their customer service said, ‘Ask them if they ate the cardboard.'”

My cousin started laughing at this point. “I asked them,” she said, “and they admitted they had eaten the cardboard.”

I thought that was hilarious because even though the cake does bend reality, I don’t think I would eat cardboard. Okay, I did eat a flower and part of a pot, but cardboard? Okay, maybe if they iced it.



Filed under food

15 responses to “Holy Cakemolie

  1. That’s one hell of a cake. If you water it will it grow bigger?

  2. Wow! The flower pot part is cake? Which part is cardboard? I’d probably eat that part too.

    • Nada

      The flower pot part is DELICIOUS. I’m not sure which part those other people at that was cardboard. Heck, maybe I ate it too. If I did, it was yummy.

  3. We are hitting the road for a few days.

  4. AZ

    Dang! In the world of cakes that one is a doozy! I on the other hand am the bake it in a 9×13, just frost the top, yeah, it’s a Betty Crocker cake mix kinda baker.

  5. OMG! Update your blog already.

    I baked muffins:


    Tell the Big Guy I already ate one, so now there are only 5 left. They are the big kind of muffins though.

  6. Pepper Moon

    What a gorgeous cake! What a thoughtful cousin! I temped for a while at Williams-Sonoma, and I can tell you that’s the best thing I ever saw come out of there. I might have to get one for myself.

    Bakingnotwriting, I like to put booze in my food, too. Try the cranberry sauce at the bottom of this post: http://blography-of-southern-writer.blogspot.com/2010/11/instant-turkey.html. I promise you will love it. I also bookmarked your muffin recipe so I can try it!

  7. Thanks for the cranberry sauce recipe! Pears and walnuts! Yum! I would probably have to leave the booze out because I always do Thanksgiving with my Mom and she’s very anti-booze in food. I don’t think that muffin recipe was my best…At all. The Big Guy will eat them because he’s Muffin-crazy (muffin manic) but I’m not going to make them that way again. That said, people who like a healthy-tasting muffin might love them. I just like my muffins to taste like cupcakes who got involved with fruit!

    • Pepper Moon

      If you’re going to leave the booze out, there’s no point in making it. That’s what gives it its wonderful flavor. Make it for yourself soon, to have with something else. I still think I’ll try your muffins.

  8. Do try the muffins and let me know what you think! I might just make that cranberry sauce for myself for no reason at all. It does sound wonderful.

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