Get Your Robot Dog Off My Lawn

These robot dogs have been sitting outside my house for days now, thinking about digging up the street because my neighbor’s sewer is plugged. I’ve seen septic companies come and go. Workers have dug up my neighbor’s yard and then, filled the holes in. I spoke to one of the workers who asked me what the people were doing who live in the house with the collapsed sewer, and my answer to that question is, “I don’t know.”

I did smell something funky for a few days wafting over the fence, and it reminded me of a long time ago when my ex-father-in-law called a roto rooter company to pump out his septic tank. Rather than “suck,” roto rooter man put the pumper truck on “blow” and catapulted feces high up into the sky all over my ex-father-in-law’s yard, and several of his neighbors’. At the time, I didn’t understand how anyone could do that, but later, after a few years of wrestling with that man and his no good son, I fully understood how someone would willfully blow poo all over that man’s domain.

And the ending to the roto rooter story is that my ex-father-in-law yelled at pumper truck worker for blowing poo all over the neighborhood so the dude drove off. Just like that. It wasn’t like my ex-father-in-law lived on a farm either. He lived in the middle of suburbia. The place stunk for weeks. In this day and time, we would have labeled it a health hazard, but back then, we just made note that the grass was extra green in odd spots that summer.

Anyway back to here and now, I think the smell was merely the folks who grow medicinal stinkweed in the house behind me. Odd how it’s hard to tell the marijuana smoke from a clogged sewer.

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6 Comments

Filed under general weirdness

6 responses to “Get Your Robot Dog Off My Lawn

  1. Nice view from behind the robot dogs though…So much for Vista de Nada.

  2. Funny post. Or maybe it’s the smell from the neighbor’s stink weed. Love that.

  3. AZ

    First husband, the southern boy, always said he wanted to start a septic tank service company so he could paint “YOUR SHIT IS MY BREAD AND BUTTER” on the sides of his pumper truck.

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