Big Dead Thing without a Head

First off, no, I do not know what this is. I can only imagine because its head is missing. Could be:

  • Human Body
  • Sea Lion
  • Walrus
  • Jimmy Hoffa

Secondly, dead animal removal will not (that is NOT) pick up carcasses from the beach and their exact quote is: “We like nature to take its course.” What course is that? A shipwrecked one where 250 pounds of headless rotting flesh lies headless and rotting on the beach. Stinking. Did I say it stank? Well, it does. Stinks.

So if you walk the beach enough, you begin to see the same people. I am seeing the same people. I occasionally see this young father with 2 kids. The boy looks around 4 years old and the girl maybe 6. I see them sporadically and they are always the same regardless of the weather. The kids are barefoot. It can be downright cold and the kids will be running barefoot. It chills my bones but they seem to really enjoy it.

Anyhoo, we are walking up to the dead headless thing that smells bad. Did I say it was stinking? The little boy looks at his dad and asks “Which side to I walk on?”

The Dad answers, “Your right.” (Yup, even though the kid can take frigid water on the toes, the smell is fixing to off a few people.)

The kid promptly goes the wrong way. The dad corrects him to get him upwind and the kids run on down the beach.

So, I say to the Dad. “I wish dead animal removal would pick that carcass up.”

The Dad replies, “They like to let nature take its course.”

We both laugh.

Then he says, “I tell the kids it died of old age.”

“It’s missing it’s head. That’s not old age,” I say.

The dad looks sheepish and then confesses, “Okay. So, I tell them a shark bit it off.”

We both laugh again, and we’re not laughing at the poor dead animal because it is a horrible sight and he obviously suffered a very weird (violent?) death but we’re laughing at the absurdity of 250 pounds of headless flesh that won’t be picked up by dead animal removal, so we tell kids a shark bit it. The end.

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24 Comments

Filed under animal, california, crap, general weirdness, Linda Mar Beach, Pacifica

24 responses to “Big Dead Thing without a Head

  1. Nice. What did you do with the head?

  2. I’m going with sea lion, since they are mating down the coast right now (you got pissed about their no dogs policy, remember?). But I still want to know what you are doing with the head.

  3. AZ

    Call the Chamber of Commerce and let them know that tourists and small children are grossed out by the sight of dead headless things and stench of rotting flesh, and remind them that Pacifica needs to put its best foot forward. And when they put their best foot forward it ought not to be stepping into headless carrion.

    • Nada

      That is a great idea, and if they don’t pick that carcass up soon, I’m totally going to call them or email them since I don’t think they are there full time. Actually, I’m hoping they drop by the blog and see what a giant rot pile it is.

  4. worldphotos

    I bet they do something when a dead whale washes up.

  5. Nada

    I laughed really hard at this but yes. They would do something for that. I think.

  6. Haven’t you read about how some city tried to dynamite a dead whale and just made a big pile of dead whale mush?

    • Nada

      I had not read that. Very weird.

      • I think it was San Diego — but maybe not? San Diego and some other city kept sending the dead whale carcass back and forth — trying to get each other to deal with it. Finally, one of the towns tried to dynamite the thing and ended up with bits of rancid whale everywhere. You’d think we’d have figured out what to do with this kind of debris after all these years!

      • Nada

        Sorry. I missed this comment somehow…okay not “somehow.” Just can’t see.

        They blew a whale up in San Diego. Another one? Sheesh. What are they thinking. I know nothing about dynamite but I know enough that you don’t stick it on whale blubber.

  7. That was in the 1970s for Pete’s sake!!! We keep blowing up dead whales and it’s never a good idea. I guess we just love to blow things up. That’s the only explanation since we don’t seem to learn from our mistakes in this area.

  8. AZ — You are a gem for locating this lovely bit of vintage footage. 🙂

  9. Nada

    AZ is a gem and a repository of little known facts.

  10. AZ

    Well, I guess I should have checked back sooner! I searched and could find no other whale explosion other than the 1970 one.

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